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Curl Commentary

When I was a kid I wanted long, frizz-free, flowing locks

Hair that flows in the wind instead of hair that’s big enough to create its own shade

I wanted hair like Rapunzel’s

Or Ariel’s

Or Sleeping Beauty’s

Or [insert name of any other role model for little girls here]

With their light hair and fair skin they were angels

What every little girl wanted to be

And it didn’t take long for me to notice that these angels didn’t look like me

“Wow, your hair is really curly”

By the age of three I got tired of hearing it

People always found it necessary to voice their expert opinions

My smile became as tight as my curls

Whenever someone reminded me of how different the messy cloud above my head was

I allowed these comments that were meant to be compliments beat down my confidence

I was quick to prick, prod, pull and stick anything in my hair that would change my appearance

And that pain that started off visual soon became internalized and

In turn, my eyes stopped wanting to look in the mirror in the morning

“Oh just straighten your hair!” They would say “It will help”

Everyone suggested that same magical solution

But claiming that you have the solution is saying that there is something to fix in the first place

And even though my hair shouldn’t have been something to fix, or a problem to solve

I still had this vision in my mind of the perfect me

3-year-old me wanted hair she could run her hands through

5-year-old me wanted nothing more than long silky hair like her mom’s

And the little blonde girls playing with the little blonde barbies in the commercials

Were 7-year-old me’s goal and passion in life

I’ve never had a more unachievable dream

“What’s it like having black hair?”

I don’t know

When I was growing up I never had a role model to teach me how to “have black hair”

There was no beautiful black angel that came from the sky to teach me about my curls

Even the movies had nothing to offer me

After all, the only African Disney princess was Simba’s mom

And even she had straight, blonde hair

Now though, I see the significance of the brown follicles that spring from my skull

Yes, it’s true

To some my hair may be crazy, distracting, exotic and have a strange circular shape

But sir, if you would stop shaping and molding labels

To place upon my unplaced, untamed style

Wait a moment, and let me tell you the story of my hair

My hair is as stubborn as Rosa Parks

And has the frizz of Harriet Tubman

My hair has the body of Hattie McDaniel

It has the color of Daisy Bates

My hair shares a cut with Lil Hardin Armstrong

And Maya Angelou and I share the same curl

So I’m finished resenting my differences

And the next time someone tells me a solution for my serious situation

I will simply respond:

It’s my hair

Why do you care?

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